Trust me friends these books are literally not worth your time. A good book creeps into my head when I’m on the elevator or waiting in line and I find myself wondering what’s going to happen. A bad book will make me choose reality television over reading and will cause me to roll my eyes and sigh out loud (causing the book to take up more of my precious reading time). For years I suffered through bad books either hoping they would get better or because I was too damn stubborn to abandon them. Well I’m proud to say those days are over. I have adopted the fifty page philosophy. If after fifty pages a book fails to secure my interest or worse yet bores me to tears I am done, walking away never to think about it again (except of course to put it on this list). So in an attempt to save you from the agony of reading a bad book here are my top offenders.
1. Girl with a Pearl Earring by Tracy Chevalier. I read this book when I was in a book club and well the main problem is the problem of nothing. As in nothing EVER happens…ever. I can’t stress this enough. Lots of times you think something is going to happen and than nothing and then ‘The End’. Oh and somewhere in the middle there are ridiculously long descriptions of rooms and scenery that did nothing for me. Further proof that being a “Classic” does not mean I have to like you as a book and I disliked this book so much I no longer even like the damn painting. Disclaimer: Lots of people like this book but that doesn’t mean you have to! 
2. Glamorama by Brett Ellis. Brett Ellis is probably best know for his novel American Psycho which was made into a cult classic on the silver screen starring Christian Bale. When I read American Psycho it was seriously scary and creeped me out. I literally hid the book in my closet on more than one occasion just in case Patrick Bateman could manifest himself out of the book and come for me. So when I was browsing the stacks at my local library and came across Brett Ellis I was excited to read something else by him that could inspire such a reaction. To say I was disappointed is the understatement of the millennium. This book was not only boring it was aggravating. At best it can be described as the tales of several disturbed youths in California and the summer after their freshman year of college. In my opinion I wanted to slap every single one the characters in the mouth. This book was everything that is wrong with American youth – over indulged, pathetic, pampered, rich kids with drug problems. Save yourself the aggravation of wanting to shake the hell of each character and tell them what life is really about. However, I do recommend American Psycho if you’ve got the stomach.
3. It’s Hard not to Hate You by Valerie Frankel. Oh title you certainly do say a mouth full as it is in fact hard not to hate this book. I loved the title and the cover art only made me want to read it more (touché old saying: “Don’t judge a book by its cover”). This book on the surface promised to be the ravings of a woman who frequently finds her self angry at people and is going to vent to the reader in a humorous and endearing fashion. In reality it is the tale of an awkward girl who was unable to form lasting relationships as a child and now would like you, the reader, to join her in blaming her overbearing mother and anyone else instead of taking any responsibility herself. To be honest I read this book after I adopted the fifty page philosophy but started it while getting my hair done so I had no other option to break the rule and read a whopping 75 pages. My hair dresser asked me what it was about and all I could muster up was a passionate “NEVER read this book!” and so I offer the same advice to you. 
